Our little girl has been a joy since her first moments with us. She has also been a tough little cookie with a will of her own. She had severe reflux as an infant, which made it very difficult for her to spend time on her back. For the first five months of her life, she would only sleep in her swing, in her stroller, in the car, or in someone’s arms. We were in survival mode and just did whatever it took to get her some sleep. After five months, we moved her to our bed. We never planned to co-sleep, but she was outgrowing the swing and it was the only place we could get her to sleep at night. She nursed throughout the night for almost thirteen months. I held her or took her for long walks or car rides for her daily naps so she could rest. I spent weeks trying to get us on a good sleep schedule, and nothing seemed to work. She needed to nurse or be moving in order to go to sleep and to put herself back to sleep. Her cries were all pretty indistinguishable – hungry, thirsty, tired, and bored all sounded like “I’ll die if you don’t help me.” This seems pretty common among babies with reflux, from my unscientific research (e.g., talking to other parents).

Finally, around ten months the reflux started to improve and it pretty much disappeared when she was a year old. At this time, her cries started to sound different. We could tell the difference between hungry, tired, angry, etc. She also, finally, began to be able to soothe herself when she was upset. I started to feel a twinge of hope that perhaps we could sleep train successfully, but I was scared to try it and fail, making our sleep problems worse. When my husband had to be out of town for a few weeks, it quickly became apparent just how impossible our sleep situation would be without his help. I asked our pediatrician which sleep training method she thought was the best and she mentioned that she had gotten rave reviews from other patients for Pam Jones, a sleep nurse who had recently started providing services in Dallas. I called Pam and she was so instantly informative and reassuring. We agreed that she would come stay with us for three nights to help me sleep train our daughter. I was terrified that it would ruin the baby’s trust in me, ruin our relationship, scar her for life, etc. Pam talked to me a few more times on the phone, answering every question I had with patience and kindness. She sent me our sleep schedule and training plan ahead of time and it was so straightforward and made so much sense.

The sleep training itself wasn’t bad, and it was so very worth it. By the third night the baby slept for 12 hours! In her crib. By herself. I would never have believed that was possible. It seemed that she was just waiting for us to give her the opportunity to learn how to sleep and relished the quiet, private space to do so. She is a fantastic sleeper now and goes to bed happily, frequently reaching for her crib before we’ve finished our lullaby.

Having Pam there to guide me – to answer questions and methodically adjust the plan based on what we were seeing was invaluable. She was warm and loving with our baby, and kind and understanding with my husband and me. Trying to do that on my own, in my sleep-deprived state, would have been a huge challenge and I’m not certain I would have outlasted the baby, who took a peculiar “I’ll just sit up until you come back” approach to the whole thing that was both heartbreaking and hilarious at the time.

If you’re feeling like getting yourself and your baby enough sleep is an impossible dream, then I wholeheartedly and unreservedly encourage you to let Pam help you both find your way through.

Courtney V. Dallas Texas